In an exclusive interview with B* Real, the actress shares why a little patience goes a long way. 

Posted: 03/11/2014 05:00 PM EDT
Kat Graham

Actress Kat Graham really does seem to have it all. The Vampire Diaries continues to be a smash hit, and she’s been spending time in the studio working on her forthcoming debut album. Her love life also couldn’t be any better, especially now that she’s engaged to her longtime beau, actor and producer Cottrell Guidry. While she admits that her professional achievements are the result of much blood, sweat and tears, she says finding her Mr. Right required more faith than work on her part.

“I wasn’t looking for love,” she tells B* Real of Guidry, who popped the question in October 2012, at the Black Women Film Network Presents: The Untold Stories Luncheon in Atlanta. “I had almost sworn off the idea of dating for a while because I had just come out from a heartbreaking relationship, but it literally just fit like a glove. I want to spend the rest of my life with him, and I am.”

Getting to that point took some much needed introspective, she says, offering this advice to single ladies still searching for that special someone. “Keep your eyes on God and on the prize. Just keep focused on your career and your relationship with yourself spiritually and all those things just work themselves out. It was only when I was focused on becoming whole within myself and just being content [that it happened].”

And when looking for that person, consider common life experiences that can serve as the foundation for a healthy, long-term relationship. “It makes a difference. I feel like our lives have been so parallel with our careers and the struggles of being African-Americans in this industry," she says of her relationship with Guidry. "You should really be with somebody who you identify with and who identifies with you.”

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(Photo: Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images )

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