There are two types of people in this world: those who detest the Kardashians and those who love them. You will never meet a single person on God's good Earth who is simply "meh" on the reality TV stars. No one is ever "wishy washy" on them, even those people who have never watched an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. And when someone does seem lax about them — as if to suggest they're not tuned into the circus — they'll footnote it with a "...but I hate them" tacked on for good measure. Similarly, those same feelings have developed for Kanye West. The jury is divided on Yeezus, where some find him to be a genius and others a complete idiot. There's really no in between anymore. So as Kim Kardashian and Kanye West both respectively lose their grey area with the public, it would only seem right that they morph into one person.
KimYe is now a single entity.
This was so bound to happen for years. When Kanye dropped those unrequited love bars on "Cold" many moons ago, it was clear that he had one mission in mind: to find his own warped version of Beyoncé. The "hottest chick in the game, wearing his chain" if you will. But since Kanye has increasingly become a caricature of himself, he had to set his sights on one of the most cartoonish figures in TV Land next to Jessica Rabbit and Bugs Bunny in drag. So he found Kim K, whose mere existence was audacious enough for the world, to the point where she barely needed a pulse. If you followed KUWTK in the early years you might recall her basically just holding up the walls. Sure she had an occasional fight with her sisters and a breakup or six, but really she was there to keep the lights on and bring the loosest version of deadpan humor in the history of comedic relief. It became endearing, at least to people like myself who have unapologetically loved this zany family from jump. Others just sort of sit and wonder when this crew will finally collapse the world from within and swallow us all whole. It's a balancing act, for sure.
So legend has it that Kanye wore Kim down. He took that ball and ran through the friend zone, bypassing every athlete Kim dated and/or briefly married — fumbling, landing the touchdown and doing a victory dance. And then something changed. His ego swelled to a size we couldn't fathom, similar to the Grinch's heart around a cherubic child. We were all stunned by this transformation, as the man who once bravely said on national television that George W. Bush didn't care about Black people, suddenly didn't care about anyone but himself. And Kim. His decision to only follow her on Twitter is clearly proof of that. And then more weird stuff happened. As Kanye became a self-imposed sartorialist, he began stuffing Kim into fashion trends she probably wouldn't have previously ventured into had she not made this man her soul mate. She became fashion wallpaper, literally, as unflattering patterns and ill-fitting clothes became her new norm. And Kanye watched on proudly, witnessing his game of dress up come to life for the cameras. And he was no fashion saint himself. Cut to the leather skirt incident that had everyone in rap ready to burn their copies of The College Dropout.
The situation intensified as their relationship did. Early on, Kanye West looked visibly uncomfortable in front of the cameras on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. In his first appearance as "bae," he was hiding behind a wall and peeking out and grinning like he was a crush in a Bollywood film. He didn't look adjusted at all, and rumor had it that he didn't plan on ever getting there. Cut to a few seasons later and he's waxing philosophical on camera about interior decorating the inside of Kim's wedding ring and dropping all sorts of spastic gems about music and fashion. If their mutual fashion faux pas were the beginning of KimYe morphing into one, then this was certainly a giant step into number two.
Kim and Kanye have both respectively broken the Internet in their own unique ways. Kim by posing nude whenever the situation (read: one of her sisters is getting more attention) calls for it; Kanye by tweeting and then regretting it. They both drop in with some madness and then pull a huge Urkel like, "Did I do that?" Of course you did, KimYe. Of course you did.
The final piece to this puzzle though lies in personality: some feel Kim has none, others feels Kanye has too much of one. So Kim's recent Twitter rant following her latest round of public nudity left everyone bewildered. She came for Bette Midler (who needlessly came for her first), added in Piers Morgan, and then even dragged her own husband's rumored $53 million debt by suggesting she was dumping her multi-million dollar app earnings into their joint bank account. Since when was Kim so bold beyond her IG back shots? Many have speculated that this was Kanye West tweeting for her, but they're the same person now so who really knows where the Kim begins and the Ye ends?
But back to the original point: you either love it or hate it. You're either aggressively tuned in or violently tuned out. And I say all of this with the huge caveat that I am both a Kim Kardashian AND Kanye West fan. I live for their respective B.S., within reason of course. I am here for the audacity, here for the poor fashion choices, here for the absurd IGs, here for the tweets and deletes. I am here for all of it. I am here for KimYe, both united and divided.
And if you're not, then too bad. You've willed this into existence by keeping their names alive, shade or no shade. You say you want to get rid of them, but by even saying that out loud you've given them more power. They're Captain Planet now: one giant combined superpower. They are KimYe, an immortal being known for strange clothes and erratic social media behavior. We birthed this phenomenon. We own this patent. We've done this to ourselves, and some of us couldn't be happier. Long live KimYe!
Your move, ChyRo.
The views expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of BET Networks.
(Photo: Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Kanye West Yeezy)