Beauty’s Wackiest Moments

Beauty’s Wackiest Moments

Published March 3, 2011

Here, a wildly unpopular opinion: Willow Smith, or at least the Willow Smith that spent an hour co-hosting the Oprah Winfrey Show this week, sure is fresh and precocious. We know O is besties with the Pinkett Smiths, but it was still a lot to see a pre-teen call her “girl” and “baby” in exaggerated tones and with hand drama to illustrate her point. But maybe such sass is cute to some. What was decidedly alarming, and not even poor Willow’s fault, was her makeup job. It wasn’t that it was garish or unflattering—it was that a 10-year-old had a noticeable makeup job. It felt a little icky to see glossy pink lips and a good amount of blush on a non-pageant contestant. Still, she is a star-in-the-making and she was on Oprah to promote her new album, so maybe mascara was called for. Perhaps.

But then how to explain the five-year-old who came out to lead a singalong of “Amazing Grace”? Her cute cheeks were rosy, thanks to her very own makeup job. Did the makeup artist assigned to the tot feel uneasy as she looked for the apples of the kindergartener’s cheeks? We’ll never know, but it was just one more bit of beauty foolishness to top off a week that’s been chock full of them. A few other highlights:

Lady Gaga says her new scent, out later this year, will smell like “an expensive hooker.” Bravo! Because isn’t that what every Top 40-loving teen wants to conjure up thoughts of when they walk past you on the street? (Apparently not, as 86 percent of respondents polled by the New York Daily News said “Ew, no!” when asked if they’d buy it.)

A new study shows that women pay more than men for some grooming and beauty habits. Before you point out that back and chest (and, yes, butt-crack) waxing at salons isn’t priced by gender even though most man parts are probably significantly hairier, consider this: Women pay two to four times more to dry-clean our (smaller) shirts. Because they don’t fit on the standard press, they require more work. But instead of creating a new, female press, dry cleaners happily collect our extra money. Women also pay more for shaving cream and deodorant; Female versions are often smaller and more than 50 cents costlier.

And, finally, though this is more biblical than beauty, the newest version of the King James Bible is getting rid of the word “booty” (as in spoils of war, not “look at that slammin’…”) because it causes too many snickers in Sunday school. But not as many snickers as the idea of the Bible's editors sitting around discussing this.


felt a little icky to see

Written by Ayana Byrd


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