As honest and as open as many people may be within their relationships, it appears to be difficult for individuals to open up to conversations about sex. No one ever wants to be the first to unlock Pandora’s box of sexual exploits, but because sex is a major part of every romantic relationship, bringing up important sexual topics is vital for maintaining a healthy sex life. It’s time to talk! Both partners must be on the same page when coming into the bedroom, and these five conversations are definite must haves to even out the sexual playing field.
— Let’s talk about tests
It may seem like a buzzkill, but knowing STD testing history is important. Sex should be carefree, and the only way to achieve an ease of mind is for the body to be disease-free. Dr. Laura Berman suggests, “bringing up this conversation when it is clear that a mutual attraction is present.” Opening up the conversation by leading with, “I was tested since the last time I had sex — what about you?” keeps the conversation light. Number of partners isn’t as important as having a clean bill of health, so numbers should not be discussed to avoid embarrassment or judgment.
— Let’s talk about turn ons/offs
No one comes with a manual of how to turn on his/her sexual body, so having conversations about turn ons and turn offs is necessary. Making and trading a list of the things that make one hot with desire or as cold as ice is a great way to study and absorb the person’s triggers. Knowing these triggers makes for a better sex session that isn’t preceded by a guessing game.
Read all five topics you and partner should be having about sex at BlackDoctor.org.
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