I hear this story a lot from my female friends. They go out, unexpectedly meet a guy that appears seemingly cool, they connect instantly! Cue: letting the good times roll. They may run into each other again and hit it off again. In some cases, that moment turns intimate.
They finally make it to a number exchange! Yay! Or so they think. The girl sends a message, like “good morning!" And then, silence. Maybe six hours later they get a “sorry just saw this message how are u.” The female instantly writes back, “its ok boo. wyd.” And, again, the deafening silence.
The girls, at this point, are over it. A day later, a text from the guy comes through. “Hey you,” it says with some type of flirty emoji. Now the response from the girl is not so friendly. She decides to write back and is not here for the games. No response. Shocker.
So I asked some of my fraternity brothers and male friends what the honest reasons were as to why they don’t text back and I got a lot of responses. Disclaimer: Don’t hate me! I am merely the messenger here to ensure that your dating life is just a little less painful. Knowledge is power, people!
“Feels that the other person is moving too fast. The premature use of words like 'bae,' 'boo' and 'baby' completely throws guys off.”
“If the text/response is too long. I don’t reply.”
“If you not in my circle of s**t talking or family (extended with close friends), I will reply when I feel like it.”
“Seriously if you are not my spouse, family, employee (calling off), the best friend, giving me urgent news or sending nudes…DO NOT TEXT ME.”
“Comments that don’t require responses, like ‘lol,’ comments that don’t involve me and comments that don’t include nudes. No response”
“Anticipation. May leave you unread for a couple of days or hours to let you know its on my time, build mystery around yourself, so when you do text them back it’s a ‘moment’ for the receiver!”
“Because I am afraid of telling them I don’t like them as much as they like me. Letting them down easy.”
“Because I am old-fashioned, give me a call.”
“I am busy and forget to text them back. Working."
“Texted back in our head.”
“Can't text and drive, so gotta wait 'til we get to where we’re going first. But by then we may have forgotten.”
“I feel asleep.”
“It doesn’t be that serious. But I don’t say that. I tell people I lost my phone or it crashed.”
“Sometimes girls look for loopholes/opportunities for miscommunication in text. So they will start a convo to break apart all my responses. I avoid these convos.”
“Redundancy and stuff like ‘wyd’ gets no responses.”
“Don’t feel like texting myself into a conversation that I don’t really have time for or want to have.”
“The person may not be as engaging via text as in person OR some girls get bored and are excessive texters. Just texting to text. The texting persona is completely different from who the person really is as a person.”
“Football was on.”
“Phone on silent.”
“With the side piece or you are the side piece :(."
“I forget to hit send and by the time I notice, I am single again cuz she [has] cursed me out!”
“I don’t want to seem clingy or too obsessed with her.”
“It’s a lot of options out there. If I am texting 5/10/15 different people, some aren’t high priority."
And my FAVORITE one: “The text came in green. No bueno.”
For the record ladies…I DO text back! (Most of the time).
(Photo: Getty Images)
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