All this week folks—mostly the ladies—were in their feelings over Juelz Santana and Kimbella’s viral engagement, and then Miguel and Nazanin Mandi’s grand wedding that took place over the Thanksgiving holiday. Why? Well, while both were profound expressions of love, the rapper’s proposal came 10 years and 2 kids later to finally pop the question (not to mention his gun trial is approaching), and the singer waited a whopping 15 years including 2+ years of engagement to walk down the aisle.
Let’s just say waiting a decade or more to get married wouldn’t fly with a lot of women. But Juelz and Miguel’s situations are proof there are some ladies who don’t mind the wait at all, so we took it upon ourselves to ask real women:
How long would you wait to get married? Is 10 or more years acceptable for your dream guy?
"I think it all depends on your situation. One thing people fail to realize, marriage isn't for everybody. Some folks do way better without getting the system involved in their love and so the time that they're "unmarried" obviously just works. Now, for ME? Nope. That's too long. I feel like even if he doesn't want the paperwork, let's just have a wedding because that's part of my dream. I am almost 30, with no kids. I don't think you can really put a time on something like marriage, but it happens and we all have this idea in our mind of how we want the timeline to go.
At this point in my life, I would wait at most three years. He has three years to propose, and we can be engaged for a year; so 4 years max for him to realize that he doesn't want to lose me. I'll give an exception if he's on the rise with his career and trying to get everything in order and I'd wait a little longer if it makes sense financially. But by doing that, I have to be 100% secure in our union, our love and our purpose with each other in order to keep pushing aside what I want." -Saphia Louise, 29
"I’m not going to put a timeframe on having to get married. It’s all about having a life partner; marriage does not solidify that a person will be with you forever. But, if you have one that’s willing to stay for the long run and not give up on you, I think it’s worth it." -Zakiah, 28
"This is hard because the decisions a parent makes for their children well being may differ from what they would do if they was single.
Unless I was someone who didn’t care about marriage I would not wait 10 years for no man. But once your put kids in the equation that sentence just may change. Idk. Kim has been with this man from jump and has invested a lot into him so I can see why she said yes. She seems to truly love and I wish them nothing but happiness." -Patricia, 28
"I think after a certain amount of time, if you know that you want to be with someone and you aren’t afraid of losing them for whatever reason, then it is fine to wait. People get married for a lot of reasons, but a lot of them are healthcare related or financial.
If that is not a factor for you, I don’t really see the big deal in waiting. I’d rather not be married to the right person than be married to the wrong person (for the wrong reasons) no matter how long it takes." -Danielle, 30
"Ten years is way too long to wait. If you don’t know you wanna marry me after three years then set me free! However if they started dating very young I understand it makes sense to wait years if you meet in high school or college.
I wouldn’t give a man children if he can’t see himself married to me. This is just my opinion after three years you should know if you love someone enough to create a family with them. A woman’s time is precious." -India, 28
"I say it all depends on our age. If we got together in our teens, 10 years is not a big deal because we're growing and maturing. If we're in our late 20s or older and 5 years have gone by, you have no plans to marry me." -Kimberly, 29
"Honestly, it depends. Juelz has done kimbella so dirty in the past so issa no in that situation-- I’m not sticking with you through all that. But personally, my baby daddy and I have been dating since high school, almost 12 years of my life. The love there is so deep and he’s never put me in a position where Ive had to wonder if It’s the right thing to do to stick around or doubt the love he has for me.
That being said it’s about timing and us each being in a comfortable space in life to take the next step together when we’re both ready. And I respect that, so I don’t clock what we got going on. Because it will happen when it’s meant to and we’re good over here sis!" -Shalaeya
"As far as Naz and Miguel, 15 years is a long time. But I guess in their case, they were working towards careers. So I would stay with my partner if we’re both working towards something great and had a plan to get married when the time was right for both of us.
But in the case of Kimbella and Juelez, issa NO for me. 10 years, 2 children and a bunch of scandals in between. No thanks, I’m not waiting or staying. She should’ve left him a long time ago." -Lauren
"Not acceptable. We could go to the court house and have our lavish wedding later if it’s because of money. That’s way too much time invested into something that isn’t a real commitment. But what works for other people may not work for me. I’m happy those men finally came around, but I don’t think I would be waiting around that long." -Brook
(Photo by Prince Williams/WireImage; Gregg DeGuire/Getty Images)