Jada Pinkett-Smith and Will Smith have revealed a WHOLE lot about their relationship struggles, sex life and more during their 22 years of marriage this past year. Now, their intimacy coach is dropping the gems that kept the spark alive between Jada and Will, and we have our notepads ready!
After Jada released her Facebook series, Red Table Talk, she began spilling some pretty intimate details of her relationship highs and lows with Will. We even got some insight from their couples’ therapist, Esther Perel, on how she helped them after a betrayal in their marriage. But what keeps them feeling frisky for each other after all these years? Michaela Boehm is ready to share!
In her interview with The Times UK, the Smiths' a-list relationship guru and close friend revealed she’s proud of the work she’s done with her celebrity clientele like Will Smith, who admitted that she saved his family with her advice and counseling. Michaela Boehm, who spent two decades helping celebrities navigate their way to healthier relationships, is letting us all in on how we can have a stronger bond and connection with our partners.
“We get an education in most areas of our lives that we’re supposed to be functional in. You’re not expected to drive a car without getting a license, but for some bizarre reason one of the most important areas in people’s lives is handed to them without an education.”
Some of her tips, like staying off your phone or sharing common interests, may seem obvious, but Boehm believes that since we have no formal education in relationships, it’s not always our fault when we’re bad at relationships.
Boehm offers a “guide to intimacy” that explains the ways in which we can grow closer to the one we love.
Take responsibility for your energy levels and your pleasure
Boehm thinks it’s not our partner's responsibility to always pick us up when we’re down and says, “Your partner is also busy and tired. Have a bath, some exercise, massage your feet. Move your body in ways that bring you back to feeling and sensual awareness.”
This is pretty self explanatory, but when it comes to loving on your guy or gal, Boehm believes you should “be curious about who they are; ask new questions. See them with a fresh eyes.”
Play with leading and following
It doesn’t always have to be the same person taking charge. Boehm reminds us that no matter what the activity, whether it’s sex or driving, one person should lead while the other person follows without being negative.
This one was definitely a curve ball! But it’s not what you think. Boehm explains this rule and says, “Pay attention to how often you touch your partner in a casual way. I often see women pet their partners as if they were children or dogs. Sweet, but definitely not sexy.”
Conscious touch exercise
If you’re wondering the right ways to touch your partner, Boehm offers this advice: “Try using your non-dominant hand to touch your partner on the arm. Touch their arm with one finger, very lightly. Then experiment with different motions, with speed, and with more and less pressure. See how light and subtle you can make the touch and still make it pleasurable. Give feedback in the form of "yes" and "no'"sounds.”
Give each other space
You don’t have to be all consumed in your significant other to show you care! Boehm believes that spending time apart, especially after work, is OK so you can wind down and aren’t just complaining about your day immediately. For parents, she says it’s good to spend time together after the kids go to bed.
(Photo: Rich Fury/Getty Images)
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