Commentary: My Double-D Life

woman in underwear

Commentary: My Double-D Life

How living with big boobs has taught me self-confidence and why it doesn't have to be such a bust.

Published October 3, 2014

I’m 4’11” and a size 32DD — not exactly what society deems as the “perfect” proportions. It seems like with all the focus in mainstream media centered on bootylicious physiques, boobs haven’t been getting the love they deserve. I have a love/hate relationship with my girls, but nowadays, it’s mostly love.

I bloomed early, and when I say bloomed what I really mean is ballooned. I was 12 and kids are cruel, but I don’t have one of those tragic bullying stories. My mom, who I inherited my large bosom from, is the one with the horrid tales of being tortured for developing too early. I, on the other hand, was actually well liked for the most part, aside from Billy Johnson.

Billy was a pint-sized, wise-cracking middle school boy who constantly felt the need to point out the fact that I had breasts. Luckily, I had good friends and overall great middle school experience, otherwise I could have really fallen prey to his abuse. However, I can say his “jokes” definitely made me feel self-conscious. To this day, I think Billy had a huge crush on me.

As the years continued and I got bigger, my boobs just became one inconvenience after the other. They got in the way at softball practice and made me hate anything that required bouncing around, like jumping jacks (but who likes those, anyways?). Since I’m a petite girl, picking out a dress with a large enough bust to fit my tiny frame was always a project.

Having double D boobs can sometimes draw unwanted attention, but looking back, I think a lot of the ostracizing came from myself. I put too much focus on the size of my chest rather than the things that really made me myself. I got older, though, and learned to love the skin I’m in.

College has a way of doing that to you. Everyone embraces differences there, and guys were definitely fond of my assets — so yeah, that helped, too. I got really into being health conscious, practicing my faith, following my passion for writing and just discovering the person I wanted to be. I truly believe when you focus on your inner being, everything else will fall in place. Don’t get me wrong, I still dealt with those pesky problems, but they no longer resulted in self-loathing situations.

I had a friend with a similar issue, and during our junior year in school she had breast reduction surgery. She came out of recovery a size C and was very happy with the results. This made me think that maybe that was a solution for me, too. The idea of surgery, recovery time and missing school was very overwhelming to me at the time, though, so I never took action.

Today, I have my pros and cons about having big boobs. Pro: even though I’m a little lady I still feel womanly. Con: backaches are part of my everyday struggle (yoga helps!). Breast reduction surgery crosses my mind every now and again still, and it’s maybe something I will decide to do in the future, especially if my back pains persist.

The point, however, is to feel comfortable in your own body and not to become a prisoner inside it. If you want to make a change, make it — just make sure you are doing it for you and not because of outside critics. Chances are there’s something, whether physical or beneath the surface, they’re struggling with that has them dumping their insecurities on you. Remember, your happiness is the only happiness that counts.

It’s a great time to be a curvy girl, love handles, butts, boobs and all.

The opinions expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of BET Networks.

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Written by Jazmine A. Ortiz

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