9 Ways to Shake Up a Boring Relationship

Put some spice back in your union.

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The Newness - It’s bound to happen: Even the best relationships can sometimes hit a rut, whether it’s in front of the television or routine sex (or no sex). But these tips will help you put some spice back in your union. By Kenrya Rankin (Photo: Wavebreak/Getty Images)

Look Inward - We often expect relationships to make us happy. But that’s literally impossible. Before you start working on your situation, stop to see if you need to work on yourself. Things like being bored at work, not taking care of yourself physically or holding on to childhood trauma can spill over into your relationship. Either alone or with a counselor, tackle any issues that might be preventing you from getting closer to your partner.(Photo: Corbis)

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Look Inward - We often expect relationships to make us happy. But that’s literally impossible. Before you start working on your situation, stop to see if you need to work on yourself. Things like being bored at work, not taking care of yourself physically or holding on to childhood trauma can spill over into your relationship. Either alone or with a counselor, tackle any issues that might be preventing you from getting closer to your partner.(Photo: Corbis)

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Do Something Exciting - New is cool, but doing something new that also thrills you a bit — skydiving, traveling somewhere unfamiliar, playing strip poker — will bring you closer. It reminds you of the days when your life together was still uncharted and creates new shared experiences.(Photo: Stephen Mallon/Getty Images)

Ditch Your Devices - Make time to just attend to each other every day. Ban phones at the table and in bed and consider leaving the television off after dinner, too.(Photo: Monkey Business Images/Corbis)

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Ditch Your Devices - Make time to just attend to each other every day. Ban phones at the table and in bed and consider leaving the television off after dinner, too.(Photo: Monkey Business Images/Corbis)

Make a 'Like List' - It’s easy to get caught up in the things that annoy you about your partner or your relationship. But what about the things you love? Make a list of all the things you adore about your situation and your mate, then share it.(Photo: Nancy Ney/Corbis)

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Make a 'Like List' - It’s easy to get caught up in the things that annoy you about your partner or your relationship. But what about the things you love? Make a list of all the things you adore about your situation and your mate, then share it.(Photo: Nancy Ney/Corbis)

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Tackle Tasks as a Couple - Try doing some of the things you typically do separately together every now and then. Blast a favorite album and bust out your chores side-by-side one week. Or head to the gym together tomorrow morning. Seeing him wash dishes will remind you that you’re not alone in running your household and breaking a sweat in tandem might send you to the bedroom sooner than planned. (Photo: Hill Street Studios/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Tackle Tasks as a Couple - Try doing some of the things you typically do separately together every now and then. Blast a favorite album and bust out your chores side-by-side one week. Or head to the gym together tomorrow morning. Seeing him wash dishes will remind you that you’re not alone in running your household and breaking a sweat in tandem might send you to the bedroom sooner than planned. (Photo: Hill Street Studios/Blend Images/Corbis)

Turn Toward Each Other - Each day, we make overtures toward the people we care about that are essentially bids for attention. If he says, “The dudes at work are crazy,” don’t just nod your head. He obviously wants to tell you about his day, so make the time to engage him in a conversation. Not only will you learn more about the world as he sees it, but you’ll show him that you care enough to pick up on his cues and reciprocate.(Photo: JGI/Jamie Grill/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Turn Toward Each Other - Each day, we make overtures toward the people we care about that are essentially bids for attention. If he says, “The dudes at work are crazy,” don’t just nod your head. He obviously wants to tell you about his day, so make the time to engage him in a conversation. Not only will you learn more about the world as he sees it, but you’ll show him that you care enough to pick up on his cues and reciprocate.(Photo: JGI/Jamie Grill/Blend Images/Corbis)

Set a Standing Date - It may seem like you’ve landed in old people land when you have to set a date night, but it can really help you make each other a priority. Plus, it’s nice to have something to look forward to. If you find that you’re often too tired or busy to have sex, this is also a way to make sure you get more together time.(Photo: Boone Rodriguez/Corbis)

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Set a Standing Date - It may seem like you’ve landed in old people land when you have to set a date night, but it can really help you make each other a priority. Plus, it’s nice to have something to look forward to. If you find that you’re often too tired or busy to have sex, this is also a way to make sure you get more together time.(Photo: Boone Rodriguez/Corbis)

Get to Sexting - Speaking of having more sex, use the times when you are apart to build up anticipation. Whether you stick to dirty talk or send naughty selfies, sexting can be great with someone you trust, and it will be hard to decide to go to sleep instead of climbing on top of him if you’ve been revved up all day.(Photo: Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Get to Sexting - Speaking of having more sex, use the times when you are apart to build up anticipation. Whether you stick to dirty talk or send naughty selfies, sexting can be great with someone you trust, and it will be hard to decide to go to sleep instead of climbing on top of him if you’ve been revved up all day.(Photo: Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Blend Images/Corbis)

Touch More - Studies show that the more you touch, the more affection you feel for each other. While sex is great, it’s not enough to foster a greater sense of intimacy. Find time to touch him more often throughout the day. Run his shoulders, smack his ass when he walks by, lie down together as you download your day.(Photo: Jutta Klee/CORBIS)

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Touch More - Studies show that the more you touch, the more affection you feel for each other. While sex is great, it’s not enough to foster a greater sense of intimacy. Find time to touch him more often throughout the day. Run his shoulders, smack his ass when he walks by, lie down together as you download your day.(Photo: Jutta Klee/CORBIS)