How to Support A Loved One With Breast Cancer
Find out what you can do during her road to recovery.
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Strong Medicine - Have a close friend or family member who has been diagnosed with breast cancer? Here’s how you can help her on the road to recovery. By Kenrya Rankin Naasel and Kellee Terrell (Photo: Granger Wootz/Blend Images/Corbis)
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Educate Yourself - Yes, you are going to feel a way about your loved one/friend being diagnosed, but you might also say things that you don’t even think are hurtful or offensive because you are misinformed about breast cancer. So make sure to educate yourself first before you step in and try to provide support and comfort.
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No Comparing - Everyone’s breast cancer experience is different, especially given the range of stages, aggressiveness of the cancer, family history and even access to treatment. So try not to compare this person’s diagnosis with someone in your past. It could more harm than good.
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Show Affection - A breast cancer diagnosis can make women feel very alone and depressed, so it’s amazing how showing them affection can make them feel appreciated and loved. Remember, a hug can really go a long way.
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Read Their Blog - Some women with breast cancer may find it easier to talk about their feelings in a personal blog or in Facebook notes as opposed to someone’s face. Try subscribing to their updates and reading their blog. That may help you have a better understanding of their needs and feelings.
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Send Cards and Notes - You may not be able to be there physically for your loved on as much as you would like, but sending cards and notes via email, can be really inspirational and empowering for women with breast cancer. The prettier the card, the better!
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Don’t Tell Them How to Feel - The last thing someone with breast cancer needs is someone telling how to feel, especially those who haven’t gone through what they are going through. Your loved one is going to be going a range of emotions from fear to rage to hopelessness. And while it may make you feel uncomfortable you just have to listen and let them grieve and process the way they need without placing your opinions and expectations on them.
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Call - Having a major illness can be isolating, so be sure to reach out often. Don’t know what to say? It’s okay, just let her know you love her and you’re thinking of her. (Photo: Sharie Kennedy/LWA/Corbis)
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Listen - Let her feel her feelings. You probably feel powerless to help, but remember that your role isn’t to cure her cancer—it’s to be there for her. So whether she’s hopeful, depressed, or somewhere in between, listen to whatever she wants to talk about without going into problem solving mode. (Photo: Mark Edward Atkinson/Tracey Lee/Getty Images)
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Defer - As much as you want her to heal and thrive, she wants it even more. So as long as she has great information, is following her treatment plan, and has considered all the options, know that the big decisions are hers to make, and yours to support. So accept and respect them. (Photo: Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Blend Images/Corbis)
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