How to Support A Loved One With Breast Cancer

Find out what you can do during her road to recovery.

Strong Medicine - Have a close friend or family member who has been diagnosed with breast cancer? Here’s how you can help her on the road to recovery. By Kenrya Rankin Naasel and Kellee Terrell  (Photo: Granger Wootz/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Strong Medicine - Have a close friend or family member who has been diagnosed with breast cancer? Here’s how you can help her on the road to recovery. By Kenrya Rankin Naasel and Kellee Terrell (Photo: Granger Wootz/Blend Images/Corbis)

Educate Yourself - Yes, you are going to feel a way about your loved one/friend being diagnosed, but you might also say things that you don’t even think are hurtful or offensive because you are misinformed about breast cancer. So make sure to educate yourself first before you step in and try to provide support and comfort. 

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Educate Yourself - Yes, you are going to feel a way about your loved one/friend being diagnosed, but you might also say things that you don’t even think are hurtful or offensive because you are misinformed about breast cancer. So make sure to educate yourself first before you step in and try to provide support and comfort. 

No Comparing - Everyone’s breast cancer experience is different, especially given the range of stages, aggressiveness of the cancer, family history and even access to treatment. So try not to compare this person’s diagnosis with someone in your past. It could more harm than good. 

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No Comparing - Everyone’s breast cancer experience is different, especially given the range of stages, aggressiveness of the cancer, family history and even access to treatment. So try not to compare this person’s diagnosis with someone in your past. It could more harm than good. 

Show Affection - A breast cancer diagnosis can make women feel very alone and depressed, so it’s amazing how showing them affection can make them feel appreciated and loved. Remember, a hug can really go a long way. 

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Show Affection - A breast cancer diagnosis can make women feel very alone and depressed, so it’s amazing how showing them affection can make them feel appreciated and loved. Remember, a hug can really go a long way. 

Read Their Blog - Some women with breast cancer may find it easier to talk about their feelings in a personal blog or in Facebook notes as opposed to someone’s face. Try subscribing to their updates and reading their blog. That may help you have a better understanding of their needs and feelings. 

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Read Their Blog - Some women with breast cancer may find it easier to talk about their feelings in a personal blog or in Facebook notes as opposed to someone’s face. Try subscribing to their updates and reading their blog. That may help you have a better understanding of their needs and feelings. 

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Send Cards and Notes - You may not be able to be there physically for your loved on as much as you would like, but sending cards and notes via email, can be really inspirational and empowering for women with breast cancer. The prettier the card, the better!

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Send Cards and Notes - You may not be able to be there physically for your loved on as much as you would like, but sending cards and notes via email, can be really inspirational and empowering for women with breast cancer. The prettier the card, the better!

Don’t Tell Them How to Feel - The last thing someone with breast cancer needs is someone telling how to feel, especially those who haven’t gone through what they are going through. Your loved one is going to be going a range of emotions from fear to rage to hopelessness. And while it may make you feel uncomfortable you just have to listen and let them grieve and process the way they need without placing your opinions and expectations on them. 

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Don’t Tell Them How to Feel - The last thing someone with breast cancer needs is someone telling how to feel, especially those who haven’t gone through what they are going through. Your loved one is going to be going a range of emotions from fear to rage to hopelessness. And while it may make you feel uncomfortable you just have to listen and let them grieve and process the way they need without placing your opinions and expectations on them. 

A Lump - Ring the alarm if you feel a lump or other thickening in your breast tissue or under your arm. Typically, a cancer mass is painless, hard and has irregular edges, but there are types that feel round and soft and tender to the touch, so always get lumps checked out.   (Photo: Sharie Kennedy/LWA/Corbis)

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Call - Having a major illness can be isolating, so be sure to reach out often. Don’t know what to say? It’s okay, just let her know you love her and you’re thinking of her.  (Photo: Sharie Kennedy/LWA/Corbis)

It's the Little Things - Have you ever been in conversation with a person you might’ve met once or twice in passing and they remember something about you? Your instant reaction is usually, “Wow, you remembered?” Being observant and paying attention to small details always makes a huge impact when connecting with someone.  (Photo: Mark Edward Atkinson/Tracey Lee/Getty Images)

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Listen - Let her feel her feelings. You probably feel powerless to help, but remember that your role isn’t to cure her cancer—it’s to be there for her. So whether she’s hopeful, depressed, or somewhere in between, listen to whatever she wants to talk about without going into problem solving mode. (Photo: Mark Edward Atkinson/Tracey Lee/Getty Images)

Myth 6: Having an Abortion Raises Your Risk of Breast Cancer - While the anti-choice movement will spread this lie, it just isn’t true. There is no reputable data that shows a connection between ending a pregnancy and your risk for breast cancer. (Photo: Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Defer - As much as you want her to heal and thrive, she wants it even more. So as long as she has great information, is following her treatment plan, and has considered all the options, know that the big decisions are hers to make, and yours to support. So accept and respect them. (Photo: Jose Luis Pelaez Inc/Blend Images/Corbis)

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Ask - Don’t just say you’re there if she needs you—she might have a hard time admitting that she needs help, or might feel bad about taking up your time. Instead, ask if you can do very specific things, such as drive her to and from treatment, keep her kids for the weekend, sit with her during treatment, manage her insurance paperwork, attend appointments and take notes, take her dog for a walk every night after dinner, be the keeper of her medical calendar or clean her place every Saturday morning. (Photo: Tetra Images/Corbis)

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Ask - Don’t just say you’re there if she needs you—she might have a hard time admitting that she needs help, or might feel bad about taking up your time. Instead, ask if you can do very specific things, such as drive her to and from treatment, keep her kids for the weekend, sit with her during treatment, manage her insurance paperwork, attend appointments and take notes, take her dog for a walk every night after dinner, be the keeper of her medical calendar or clean her place every Saturday morning. (Photo: Tetra Images/Corbis)

Healthy Diet  - Cultivating a balanced diet helps build strong cells and healthy breast tissue and plays a vital role in maintaining breasts perkiness.   (Photo: Tim Pannell/Corbis)

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Enlist - If you are her primary caregiver, you will need help to manage aspects of her life and keep up with your own, too. Don’t be afraid to put her friends and family to work, whether that means creating a meal schedule where they can drop off dinner and lunch, or sending around a driver signup sheet so there is always someone available to accompany her to treatment. (Photo: Tim Pannell/Corbis)

Connect - As much as you want to help, she can gain a lot from meeting with people who have been where she is and made it through. With her permission, sign her up for a program that will pair her with a mentor who has already survived breast cancer. AfterBreastCancerDiagnosisSupport.org is a great place to start, and MyBCTeam.com is a social network that connects women who are currently living with breast cancer. (Photo: Kate Kunz/Corbis)

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Connect - As much as you want to help, she can gain a lot from meeting with people who have been where she is and made it through. With her permission, sign her up for a program that will pair her with a mentor who has already survived breast cancer. AfterBreastCancerDiagnosisSupport.org is a great place to start, and MyBCTeam.com is a social network that connects women who are currently living with breast cancer. (Photo: Kate Kunz/Corbis)

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Encourage - Help her retain a sense of normalcy by pushing her to stay connected to her life. That can mean taking care of herself as much as possible (without adversely impacting her health), having brunch with friends, or getting out to the movies from time to time. (Photo: Peathegee Inc/GettyImages)

Cheerlead - Be her personal cheering section when things are hardest. Tell her how much you love her and how proud you are for everything she’s done so far, and reassure her that she can make it through. (Photo: Image Source/Corbis)

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Cheerlead - Be her personal cheering section when things are hardest. Tell her how much you love her and how proud you are for everything she’s done so far, and reassure her that she can make it through. (Photo: Image Source/Corbis)

Don't Forget To Take Care of You - As much as their diagnosis isn’t about you, that doesn’t mean it can’t take a toll on you. You may be struggling and need help—and that’s perfectly OK, just don’t ignore that voice in your head. Make sure you have the proper support to talk about your fears for your loved one. (Photo: Getty Images)

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Don't Forget To Take Care of You - As much as their diagnosis isn’t about you, doesn’t mean it can’t take a toll on you. You may be struggling and need help—and that’s perfectly OK, just don’t ignore that voice in your head. Make sure you have the proper support to talk about your fears for your loved one. (Photo: Getty Images)