Father's Day is a holiday that brings about different sentiments, depending on situational considerations. For some, it can be a joyous occasion, while for others, it can be a reminder of something that's missing. If you count yourself as part of the latter group, arrangement.com has a unique approach to navigating Father's Day this year.
The website, an "unapologetic dating platform that connects sugar daddies with sugar babies" (their words, not ours), has a new service called Daddy-On-Demand. With services ranging from $50 to $1,000, a random dudebro can stand in and perform the fatherly duties that shape the celebration of masculinity that is Father's Day. Because nothing says "I swear I'm well-adjusted despite my circumstances" quite like a rentable surrogate father figure!
A singular "Happy Father's Day Call" can be yours for a modestly priced $50. "We’ll have a Dad on the ready to accept a Father’s Day call from your kiddo making sure Dad and kid feel extra special on Father’s Day," says the website. There is something heartwarming about paying to play an elaborate game of make-believe, no?
Got a Father's Day BBQ coming up? Say no more, fam. Daddy-On-Demand has not one but two packages for such an occasion. Whether you need a man that can grill or just one that will exchange pleasantries and provide moral support when your family broaches Trumpian topical conversation, they've got you covered. For a mere $300 or $350 (actually grilling costs more), it's practically a steal.
If you find yourself in need of an amateur actor for more than just one Father's Day activity, enter the "Mac Daddy" package. (The name of this package. Sigh.) Priced at $1,000, this package will provide you with a down dude who's gonna be willing to do whatever you need. (Within reason? We think?) The most "extensive" package, the Mac Daddy "is somewhat limitless, but must be completed on Father's Day," according to the company.
While it's hard to picture a non-sus person that'd be willing to stand in as a father figure for strangers for the right price, you can have the peace of mind that all faux fathers have to submit to criminal background checks prior to becoming a fake dad, per the company. So fret not, while it may be stressful to secretly rent a dad, you need not worry that he's a criminal. So at least there's that.
For your most pressing Father's Day needs, just rent a random. In this dystopian hellscape that is 2017 in America, surely weirder sh*t is happening than this. You know the old adage — we accept the fathers we think we deserve, or something. Who's your daddy? With Daddy-On-Demand, it could be any interested party with a background check. Fake it 'til you make it, right?