In Black communities, conversations about mental health often live behind closed doors, if they happen at all. Many of us were raised to “tough it out,” “pray on it,” or keep family matters private. While these cultural norms were meant to protect us, they can also leave people suffering in silence. With suicide rates among Black youth and adults rising in recent years, it’s more important than ever to break this cycle of silence and know how to show up for those we love.

Recognizing the signs of emotional distress or suicidal thoughts isn’t always easy, but it could save someone’s life. Sometimes it’s obvious—a loved one may openly say they’re struggling or express feelings of hopelessness. Other times, it’s subtle: they start withdrawing from friends, neglecting their appearance, or suddenly giving away possessions that once mattered to them. These changes, especially when they’re out of character, are signals that something deeper might be going on.

In our culture, we celebrate resilience. We praise people for being “strong” and “unshakeable.” But that narrative can become dangerous when it prevents us from asking for help. The cousin who never misses a family cookout, the coworker who’s always cracking jokes, the friend who seems to have it all together—they might be the ones silently fighting the hardest battles.

By tuning in to small changes in someone’s behavior or mood, you can create a safe space for them to open up. That doesn’t mean you need to be their therapist. In fact, one of the most powerful things you can do is simply listen without judgment.

Approaching someone you suspect is struggling takes courage. Start with gentleness: “Hey, I’ve noticed you haven’t been yourself lately. Do you want to talk about it?” These words open a door without pressure. If they share, resist the urge to minimize their feelings or jump straight to advice. Instead, let them feel heard.

Validation is powerful. A simple, “That sounds really hard” or “Thank you for trusting me” can go a long way. Sometimes, all a person needs is to know they’re not alone. From there, you can gently encourage them to seek professional help, whether that’s a therapist, a support group, or a crisis hotline.

When someone you care about is in pain, it’s natural to want to fix everything for them. But being a source of support doesn’t mean carrying their entire burden. In fact, it’s important to set boundaries for yourself while guiding your loved one toward professional resources.

Offering concrete help—like looking up culturally sensitive therapists, walking them through calling the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, or simply checking in regularly—can make a huge difference. Resources like Therapy for Black Girls, Black Men Heal, The Loveland Foundation, and the Black Emotional and Mental Health Collective (BEAM) exist to meet the unique needs of our communities.

Talking about suicide has long been taboo in many Black families, but silence has never kept us safe. Every conversation we have chips away at stigma and reminds those we love that they don’t have to fight their battles alone. Sometimes, the smallest gestures—a text, a call, an invitation to sit and talk—can be the lifeline someone desperately needs.

You don’t have to be a professional to make a difference. You just have to care enough to notice, to ask, and to stand with someone when the weight feels unbearable. Your willingness to reach out could be the first step toward healing—for them and for you.

If you or someone you love is struggling, call 988 or visit 988lifeline.org for confidential support.