32 Year-Old LeBron James Wants Answers To His Hairline Dilemma

32 Year-Old LeBron James Wants Answers To His Hairline Dilemma

Welp! He's upset that he's balding so early.

Published 1 week ago

To most men, LeBron James is #goals for a multitude of reasons.

He has the beautiful wife, a rack of championship rings, an abundance of cash and his own shoe! You would think this man has it all, but to LeBron, he doesn't have it all. He is actually envious of other MVPs like Dwyane Wade.

What’s missing for LeBron? His hairline. **insert sad face**

Even LeBron likes to joke about his hairline 😂 📹: @kingjames

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#PressPlay: #LeBronJames needs answers about his hairline problems 😩👀

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LeBron’s hairline has been a dilemma for him throughout most of his career. Now, he's even going as far to suggest he should make his beard into a velcro-optional hairpiece for his head. Please don’t do that, LBJ! You'd need Olivia Pope in order to fix that nightmare.

There is all types of grooming “sorcery” available for LeBron and other guys use to help with this hairline problem. As a Black man, the worst thing that a woman can do to you is question your hairline. It’s heartbreaking! If LeBron is insecure about his hairline, imagine how the average guy feels. Believe it or not, Black men are negatively affected by hairline anxieties too. It honestly is a thing, similar to woman obsession with “edges.”

According to BlackDoctor.Org, there are some options that Black men have to protect our hairlines from extinction. In LeBron’s case, keep the fades and don’t try to do weird hairstyles like the “braided man bun.” “Braids add a great amount of tension on your hairline. It’s not a good idea to rock cornrows if you’re concerned about keeping that lining intact. Think stress, think hairline back to the middle of your head every time you ask for somebody to braid your hair.”

Your bedding can play a role as well. BlackDoctors.org suggests silk sheets and pillowcases. “Cotton sheets don’t allow your head to freely move while you’re sleeping. The friction causes your hair follicles to become irritated. Throw away those cotton sheets from college and grab some 600-800 thread count satin or silk pillowcases. Silk fibers are similar to the structure of human hair, and will cause less friction on your hair, giving your lining a chance to get front (g)row treatment.”

Christian Combs may just be blessed with good genetics. Don’t spend hours in the mirror trying to achieve jet-ski waves like his if you don’t have the hair. The overbrushing actually creates extra stress for your hairline, especially if you were wearing a style that requires you to brush backward, like an old-school slickback. It will damage your hairline as well. Also, avoid shampoos and sprays that use alcohol, because that will dry out your scalp and promote hair loss.

Diet makes a different gentleman, especially when it comes to super foods like fish (think salmon, mackerel and sardines), oysters and almonds. The omega-3 fatty acids, vitamin D and protein found in these foods help keep your scalp healthy and your follicles rich. Oysters provide zinc — and according to BlackDoctors.org, hair loss has been linked to zinc deficiency.

See, LeBron, we got answers! But wait, there's more.

Other experts suggest the use of castor oil, which can stimulate blood circulation and revive the hair.

If you just don’t want to be bothered with any of that and have LeBron’s bankroll, there are quick fixes that provide short-term and long-term results. You have the option to do a hair transplant for long-term results or try the trendy hair units for males (also known as “the man weave.”)

And, it doesn't stop there. The use of hair tattoos is also on the rise, especially for a crisp hairline. The Atlanta-based Hair Simulation Company specializes in “cosmetic tattooing for the uniqueness of black and afro-textured hair” according to their website. 

Similar to tattooed eyebrows (or microblading), this company uses microscopic strokes to permanently simulate the appearance of a full head of hair. These artists are able to simulate a fresh haircut with personalized hairlines.

Medically, you can use Finasteride. Finasteride is the first treatment that works effectively in treating many cases of pattern baldness. We advise you consult with a doctor in detail before considering this because it’s also used for prostate problems. We're just saying...

The last (and final) option is just to follow the wave of the women and go natural. What does that mean for us guys? Just let your hairline grow however it feels and leave these bad barbers alone!

Rule No. 1 of the barbershop: never go to a barber who is sitting in his own chair in a crowded barbershop. Just ask who is the busiest and take a number for him. 

LeBron, we truly hope this helps. Otherwise, we think the headbands are really cool bro!

Written by Maurice Marcel

(Photo: Jason Miller/Getty Images)

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