Ahh, the ever-so flourishing era of insta-fame and ce-web-ities adds a new recruit to the mix: Danielle Bregoli. This 13-year-old “badass” was a featured guest on the Dr. Phil show last year because of her out of control behavior. However, in a moment where she felt the audience, “a bunch of h**s,” were laughing at her, she coined the now infectious phrase “cash me ousside, how ‘bout dah?,” making the effort to rehabilitate her behavior on national TV counterproductive as it only assisted in her bravado being glorified and memorialized in memes, a Billboard Hot 100 remix and rap video.

You have to admit, it is a comical rebuttal that is practically applicable in most conversations. And while it might not be the most original phrase, people have been saying “catch me outside” and asking “how about that?” rhetorically for generations now, it was how she said it with her accent from “the streets” that made it turn heads. I can’t scroll through my social media accounts without her phrase being mentioned in one meme or another. So, naturally, I Googled her story and watched a few videos. Apparently that phrase isn’t the only saying she throws around on cue and loosely.

Being biracial, I am familiar with the controversial “N word" in more ways than one. It obviously derives from a historically derogatory word used to dismiss, demean and disrespect me and my ancestors. But, calling a spade a spade, it is often used as slang now among Black and brown millennials. It is a noun typically used to describe a person, not just a Black person but any person. However, I must emphasize this word, as slang, is accompanied by rules. Rule No. 1: Never say the “N word" around your grandparents! They do not accept this as a form of slang and only as a form of disrespect. Even if you’ve heard them say it, they will deny it and they will curse you out for using it. They “lived” it, you didn’t. They have a right to use it, you don’t. Don’t argue, it isn’t worth it. Rule No. 2: It is only a word acceptable for the Black and brown community. If you grew up Caucasian, privileged, have no idea what financial aid is, refer to your "block" as your street, you are not permitted to use it. Rule No. 3: If you grew up in a Black/brown 'hood/community and are not Black/brown you MIGHT be permitted to use the “N word" amongst close friends and family. NEVER USE IN MIXED COMPANY! Marrying into a Black family, having Black best friends, enjoying Black culture or transferring to that Black school district in 5th grade doesn't give you a public pass, period.

There are several videos of Danielle Bregoli spewing the “N word" like there is no tomorrow all over the internet. Face value alone, you are appalled that she is seemingly breaking rules 2 and 3. Not to mention, she is 13. I don’t know about most folks, but the “N word," slang or not, is still deemed a profanity that should not be used in the company of adults/your parents or in a public recording. Granted, her fame spawned from a Dr. Phil appearance of her being a troubled teen with a bad temperament, so I did not clutch my pearls too tightly. It did make me wonder, however, what her story REALLY is? Because when one privileged white girl is all over the internet saying the “N word," other privileged white people feel like they can say it too. When that's the case, it’s being appropriated and misused and we’re back from slang to racism.

Earlier, I mentioned I’m biracial, but to be honest, I don’t feel “white” and “Black,” just "Black." The summation of a super long story (my entire life) is my white father was adopted as a baby by a Black family in Harlem…in the projects. Yes, he was probably the first white guy to gentrify Harlem (inadvertently) and I apologize to all of the families that are being forced out of their neighborhoods 30 years later because of it. Yet, I digress.

My dad’s adopted brothers made sure no one messed with him in Grant Projects. He was one of the "brothers" and raised by his adopted Black family accordingly, as a Black man. He married a Black woman and has helped raise a (Black) daughter. My dad has used the “N word" as slang in our household in conversation with my cousins, uncles, aunts and others and it always sounded so natural, so effortless that if you spoke with him on the phone you wouldn’t have any idea he’s technically white. He would never say the “N word" in front of mixed company, especially someone that has no clue what his very unique background is. A white person comfortably saying “n***a” as slang seems to be based off of where they grew up, how they grew up and which Black people in their life gave them a pass. How many white people do you know that can sincerely say they’ve only ever known a Black mom and dad? Probably none, right? Making my dad an extremely rare exception to the very strict rule of who can and can’t say the “N word." That said, just because someone’s close Black family or friends may be comfortable allowing them to use the word doesn’t mean everyone else will be.

I was trying to dig deep into the life of Danielle Bregoli to understand on a level of 1-10 how offended I am by her using the “N word" so freely. For starters, her mom was bringing her to Dr. Phil in search of a positive change to her bad-girl attitude. A parent trying to rehabilitate their child means the child is probably living a life opposite of their mother’s efforts or against their mother’s will and not by default of their norm. Danielle lives in Boynton Beach, Florida, a working class, majority white community that, prior to her meme-dom, made headlines for having racist cops. From what I’ve seen of her comments on “Black girls trying to get their hair white” and wearing weaves to make it “soft,” I don’t get the vibe she hangs with only Black and brown girls and jumps double dutch in the middle of the block after school… well before she dropped out. She also seems to be catching some serious beat downs when she’s caught outside and around the Black and brown girls she’s appropriating from.

At this point, I am not sure if I am more offended by her using the “N word" or getting paid $30k for public appearances after she ripped off Kodak Black and put out an unofficial official music video to his song. She did not earn the right to use that word by trying to fight an audience member on the Dr. Phil show and spewing out some ridiculous phrase. There’s even video on the internet of her using the “N word" as Black and brown crew members walk around her. Does the “N word" fall on deaf ears when you’re getting cut a check?! A part of me wonders if Kodak Black is using her (white) demographic to his advantage to some degree or are they both joining forces for shock value to give us all something to talk about?

All in all, as a brown girl with an "Uh-Oh Oreo" father and Black mother, I have to say I do not buy what this girl is selling and she certainly doesn’t have the same upbringing as my dad. Maybe I have turned into my grandmother and see the “N word" only as slang when it’s used by and for its permissible audience. I would love to hear why she feels so comfortable saying the “N word" in public. She gives me the, “I have Black friends so I can say it” vibe. Well, Danielle, YOU AIN’T BLACK, HOW 'BOUT DAH!

Editor’s note: At the time of publication Danielle Bregoli’s team had not responded to requests for a Q/A with the teen.

NYC native, Brittany Whitfield, is an entertainment driven renaissance woman that has dipped her hands in comedy, beauty, and TV/Film In hopes of eventually becoming a big fish in a BIG pond.